Ghosts, Treasure and Forests. FS18. Short Stories for Grown Ups

Ghosts, Treasure and Forests. FS18. Short Stories for Grown Ups

Ghosts Vote for Furniture
He was a friend of no one, and no one was his friend. He kept the home warm in winter as his parents had done. For twenty months he had no need of living room furniture or television. Family ghosts visited and were concerned that he had no furniture. Geraldine Rose scolded him for his Spartan decor. He told her there was nothing to be concerned about. He had been rich and poor. This was not poor. This was building for the future. He had no debt, he had savings, and all he had fit into a pickup.

The ghosts voted on whether he should buy furniture or spend the money on a road trip to visit living family.

The vote for furniture was:
Mother Geraldine Rose yes
Grandmother Nora yes
He no
Stepfather Two Allan O’Connor yes

The vote for a road trip to visit living family was:
Mother Geraldine Rose no
Grandmother Nora no
He yes
Stepfather Two Allan O’Connor no

He agreed to purchase furniture eventually. The furniture was to include a hide-a-bed, a mantle clock, a coffee table, a television and an Irish crystal candy dish.

Bachelor Odds and Ends
Generalities
The older Father got, the more he spoke in generalities. Here are just a few.
A watched pot never boils. An ignored one always explodes.
Some men are old and alone by design. They do not experience loneliness, but they often deal with boredom.
Most married men lead lives of quiet desperation because they fear divorce.
A man should sweep his own side of the street.

Treasure in Heaven
There were good deeds he hoped built treasure in Heaven.
Like prayer
Writing a book
Forgiving Mrs. Lopez’ rent debt
Forgiving Son’s debt
Cash gifts to young family members
A few elements of his teaching career
Visiting family when invited
Reaching out to his grandsons, and
Leaving his money to The Church.

Best Inventions
He said that the bests inventions of his lifetime were the internet, the home computer and cell phones. He also included nail clippers because before them Geraldine Rose used tiny scissors on him and his brothers when they were children, and the tiny scissors were inefficient and painful.
Items that had not improved in his lifetime were bottlecaps, indoor plumbing and, except for the microwave oven, kitchen appliances.

Moving Costs
He had moved often: for a job, better rent or just a change of scenery. He had paid $900 to men to move his possessions to the next county. But after he bought a pickup, he learned to cull his possessions and spend $80 on a move. It would have cost him eight thousand dollars to move to Texas from California, but after the cull and the pickup, it cost him nine hundred dollars. Such are the decisions an old man makes when he retires on a shoestring budget.

He was 62 when he developed a road trip formula for travel costs.
T= fuel costs + maintenance + lodging + food
T = (m/13)($4) + 0.04 m + 150n + 30n
T = total cost, m = miles traveled, n = nights in a motel
Variables were m for miles traveled and n for nights in a motel.
Constants were 14mpg, $4/gallon for fuel, 4 cents a mile for maintenance costs, $150 per night for lodging, and $30 a day for food.

He also wrote a savings depletion table (not included here).

The goal of these accounting tools was to spend his savings before he was infirm; and to leave enough for hospice and his funeral. Also, he wanted to go on one last road trip through the West.

Father Answers the Question If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

A man lives and dies alone, just as tree falls in the woods. Did his life have meaning? Did it make a sound? Yes, it did. Life is sacred.

Would his life have been more fulfilling if someone had been there to observe and remember and be a companion? No, because man is never alone. The man who thinks he suffers from loneliness has fallen for the myth that there is a mate for every man. A man needs a woman like a fish needs a bicycle. The involuntarily celibate man, nicknamed “incell” today, should think of this condition as a blessing. It is merely mind over matter. When he understands this, he understands that he is bored, not lonely, and that the cure is to have a hobby.

Father felt he had lived several lifetimes: his happy childhood; his blue-collar poverty; fatherhood, when he lived childhood again through Son; his entry into the middle class and his passage through middle age when all his favorite relatives grew old and died; his Catholic school teacher job where he experienced celebrations like Halloween, Christmas and Easter again in a school community that was reminiscent of family. He had had these lives and he thanked God for them.

There was no loneliness in Texas. He did not know a soul there. The cost of living was such that he could better support himself. He strove to never become a burden upon others.
He was constantly a tree falling in the forest and making sound.